dunno

I was just staring at my ceiling and listening to Tori Amos, when I came to the sad realization that the only time I'll have a complete grasp of my life was 6 years ago. It's all in the air now.

I went to a night club last night with a bouncy floor. It was great. Anyone's a rockstar dancer when the floor bounces. China's great because you can walk in a club with a cage door entrance to men table dancing with each other and yet still be in a strait bar. Or at least a Chinese bar. And everyone's drinking Coca Cola. On a Monday night. And it's crowded.

The best part of the night was the slow dance. They dimmed all the lights and put on "Hotel California" while five brave couples held each other on the dark dance floor. I haven't seen a slow dance like that since I was 13.

There's no privacy in this town. Everything I do people talk about. "My friend saw you buying a cola at the store the other day." "My brother saw you walking along the river." "You were at the post office the other day, right?"

There are half a million people in this town and I think about 400,000 of them know who I am. I know (or recognize) maybe 50. And I only know about 6 people's names. And sadly, I know every other foriegner in Lin'an.

"There's another one like you, but he's a man." "He's young and his hair is the same color as mine?" "Yes." "Yes, I know him, but he's from Australia." "Yes, another 外国人。“

We're all the same. There's only 12 of us. Well, of the non Japanese or Korean foreigners. If you add the Japanese and Koreans, then there are like 16.

Thank God I'm spending all of next week away from this town.